10 Great reasons to cancel your holiday in Cumbria

Lots of people work hard to promote the county, support local businesses and encourage people to keep visiting - but enough.  Lots of people seem determined to cancel their hols here and, to be honest, who can really blame them.  Here are a bunch of reasons you might want to consider...

1.  The buildings are all falling down - there's no denying it.

Furness Abbey

Penrith Castle

Shap Abbey

Piel Castle

2. It always rains here - of course it does, it rains here every

Riggindale Valley

 ...single...

Crinkle Crags

 ...solitary...

 ...day.

Windermere

3.  The food is rubbish - best bring a packed lunch

4.  There's nothing to do if you don't like hill walking - good point - I'd never noticed it was so *boring* around here...

Go Ape Grizedale

Coniston Steamers

Morecambe Bay Cycleway

Longbow making at Quirky Workshops

Brockhole Windermere

Gorgeous Greystoke Cycle Cafe 

5.  There's absolutely nothing to do in the evenings - yup, us locals just sit around all evening and stare at the sheep.

There's nothing on the Go Lakes website except for this...

The Brewery Arts Centre in Kendal is also pretty quiet...

I mean, why would you even go to the Rheged Centre...

...or the Theatre by the Lake in Keswick?

Baaaaa

6.  The locals are weird... and they stare at you...

7.  The shops are rubbish - we can't deny that one either, afraid there are no huge shopping malls for you to while away the hours - just these nasty little local shops that insist on sourcing stuff locally instead of flying in exotic goodies from miles away.

Keswick Boot Company

8.  There are no beaches here - no - not one single beach.  Oh, except for these...

9.  There's nowhere to stay... the standard of accommodation is shocking - someone really ought to do something about that...

Armathwaite Hall near Keswick

Crumble Cottages Cartmel

Bays Brown Farm

Photo from FABULOUS Richard Jennings My Wainwrights blog

10.  And if you are going to insist on still coming here, only come in the summer, there's nothing at all to see during the rest of the year...

Honestly, I have no idea why anyone ever comes here - if I were you I'd hit that cancel button right now - you're not going to be missing a thing... (Oh, and if you decide not to cancel, check out this blog for some other things to do & local information.)

PS Don't forget about our books - they are crammed with great reasons to give the county a miss... 😉

CLICK HERE to learn more

A decision of historical importance

It's been one of those days. I'm feeling a bit under the weather and spent yesterday and this morning melting my brain over a work project. Fresh air was needed. Due to our combined efforts we missed the planned train to Silverdale so trudged home to drive there.

Once in the car I piped up that now we were in the car we could go anywhere - the only problem was neither of us was in the mood to make a decision.  We were half way to Ingleborough  (don't ask), before we decided to turn the car around and go to Leighton Moss.

As we retraced our steps back along the A590 we both noticed a couple of tunnels in the hillside so changed our plans again and decided to go and see what they were. We found a spot, parked up and spent a further 5 minutes deciding whether to go and explore them after all. (Seriously - is it just us that has days like this?).

Anyway, turns out the tunnels were pretty darned interesting and we were very glad we went and had a look - plus we found a fairy house on the way back - bargain.  So here's a few pics of it all, you know, in case you can't decide what to do one day.

Tunnels just big enough for horses

Colourful adjectives

I've written in the past about what walking guides say and what they actually mean and I focused primarily on the directions, well today I want to turn my attention to the way they describe what they see.  Having now written a good selection of walks based in and around Cumbria I can tell you that finding new and exciting ways to describe the landscape isn't always easy - but here's a rough guide to what we really mean...

"Remote" - 5 miles from the nearest Tesco
"Very remote" - 10 miles from the nearest Tesco
"Remote isolation" - 10 miles from the nearest Tesco and no phone signal

Blissfully remote isolation

"Green pasture" - boggy

"Lush green pasture" - very boggy
"Rural idyll" - smells of cow sh*t

A very lush green pasture and a rural idyll to boot.

"Spectacular" - mountains
"Dramatic" - mountains with moody clouds

Dramatic, definitely dramatic

"Peaceful" - lake
"Relaxing" - admiring the lake from the beer garden
"Historic landscape" - lots of old buildings, many of them falling down

Piel Island - Historic Landscape

"Stark beauty" - no trees
"Windswept" - what trees there are are all growing at a 45 degree angle

Windswept and intereseting

"Breathtaking" - that was a bit of a steep climb
"Picturesque" - white stone building in view...
"Quaint" - ...with a thatched roof...
"Idyllic" - ...which just happens to be a pub

Idyllic (hic)

"Barren wilderness" - whaddya mean there's no pub?!

"Rugged" - I may have just sprained my ankle

"Wooded" - trees blocking the views

"Parched landscape" - you're clearly not in Cumbria

Sweet dreams are made of this.

Following our dream to live & work in Cumbria has rarely been easy.  Even this week we've been making difficult decisions about the long planned alterations to our tiny bungalow.  We've been here 5 years now & still have half our stuff in boxes in the undercroft.

But there are some days, like today, that make every ounce of hardship and effort worthwhile.  We're working on a commission for our very good friends at Cumbria Wildlife Trust and decided to take advantage of the sunny skies to get a walk done for them in and around Martindale.  The end result will be out later in the year accompanied by Steve's fab pics but, for now, I just wanted to share these few shots of what has been a spectacular day in the fells. Full time permanent employment may have its perks but I wouldn't have traded today's felltop sarnie and flask for the fanciest business lunch in the poshest restaurant anywhere.  Some things just can't be bought.

10 Great Reasons to buy our book

Please excuse this interlude for shameless self promotion, but a girls gotta eat and Santander are lovely but do keep pestering me for mortgage money each month.  If you're planning your hols in Cumbria our books will be a HUGE help - here's why you should buy them. 😀

1.  Because of all of Steve's fantastic photos.  There 100's of photos in our books and pretty much all of them (apart from the historic ones cos he's not that old) were taken by Steve.  Pics that look a bit like this but are LOADS better because Steve took them (the publishers don't want us using pics from the book in the blog)

Name that bit of coastline?

2.  Because of the words - I'm not bigging them up and claiming to be the next Ruskin, but I promise you they are really well researched.  On one occasion I spent 2 days tracking down a fact that takes up 2 lines in one of the books.  I'm not saying it's perfect but I am saying that I tried really, really hard.

Fantastic support from Mountain Heritage Trust

3.  Because they come from the heart.  We both live in Cumbria and Steve grew up here.  Yes we'd like to earn some money from our books but our primary driver is to tell people about this amazing county and share our experiences and some of the stuff we've learned along the way.  I mean, how can you not love a place that looks like this?

Coniston Fells

4.  Because Sir Chris Flipping* Bonington told us how much he loved our first book. We got in touch with him and sent him an early draft and got the loveliest email back telling us how much he enjoyed it and giving us this fabulous sleeve note. (*may not be his real middle name.)

We met him at the Kendal Mountain Festival later in the year and thanked him in person for his kind words - he even signed a copy of the book for us to keep.

5.  Because lots of other people like them too (you are, of course, welcome to buy our books from Amazon, but we make 2 tenths of naff all if you do - if you buy them from us we'll lovingly hand pack them ourselves & skip to the post office to post them personally.)

I'll be honest, there's a 2 star review on there for our first book from someone who thought it was smaller and "not as comprehensive" as they were expecting.  Fair enough - to help give you an idea of what to expect that book is 96 pages long with 20,000 words and 100 photos and represents 12 months of hard work and research.  It's not a detailed academic text but it covers most of the salient points of the areas we focus on in much the same tone as this blog does.

6.  Because we cover the whole county and not just the Lake District fells.  We LOVE the fells but wanted to tell a bigger story about Cumbria and encourage folks to visit places they wouldn't normally consider - like Whitehaven for example.  I have a HUGE soft spot for Whitehaven with its fascinating history and breathtaking views.

The historic harbour at Whitehaven

7.  Because you'll be supporting a local business if you do.  It's hard work making money from writing - not complaining, I flipping love it - but any and all support we get is most welcome. In the interests of full disclosure I should let you know that our royalty payments from last year paid off half of our mortgage... well... technically they paid half of one month's mortgage payment, but it's a start! And if you support us then we can support other local businesses - and not just the chippy and the local pub, honest...

From Fish-over-Chips in Grange-over-Sands

8.  Because we've currently got loads in stock and will whiz one out to you by first class post within moments of receiving your order.  We may not be able to offer Amazon Prime style tracked packages, but we are "primed" and ready to despatch your order.  (You see what I did there..?)

Ready to roll!

9.  Because you need it for planning your next visit to Cumbria - we've dedicated a lot of blogs and social media time to encouraging folks to keep coming to Cumbria in the wake of the winter storms and this book will help you as you plan your itinerary.

The full chapter list for book 1 is:

Furness Abbey

1. High Street and Haweswater

2. The Other Borrowdale

3. Smardale Gill

4. Grange-over-Sands and Cartmel

5. Dunmail Raise and Thirlmere

6. Kentmere and Longsleddale

7. Whitehaven and St Bees

8. Langdale Valley and Great Gable

9. Barrow-in-Furness and Walney Island

10. Buttermere and Rannerdale


10.  Because it's so easy to buy - just click here to go to the book buying page.  You can use your PayPal account if you have one and if you don't you can pay by debit or credit card - just click on the "buy now" button and follow the instructions on the screen.

WE NOW HAVE TWO MORE BOOKS to add to your collection - and TWO MORE on their way in the next couple of months PLUS we've just agreed content for another book for summer 2019!  Click the pic to find out more & order your copies - once we're mega stars they'll be worth a fortune!  😀

Click here to find out more

Thank you - and have a great day!

Thanks - from me & him.