Alone again, naturally

One thing that is becoming more apparent to me as lockdown restrictions ease, is that I'm a bit of a freak.  I mean, I've always known I was a bit weird, but now I feel as if I am decidedly odd, and definitely at odds with most of the rest of the country.

I adored the solitude of lockdown.  I have loved being at home.  I still do - I am not remotely bored with it.

Days gradually became a whirl of Zoom meetings and delivering online courses, punctuated with lovely leisurely lunches of freshly made sarnies and a proper cup of tea.  Every morning and evening I would wander off into nearby Eggerslack woods, following barely trodden paths to enjoy time completely alone, far away from the rest of the world and the ping of my mobile phone.  I saw deer - honest I did - though the varmints always legged it before I could get my camera out.

Then I broke my leg.  Not the worst thing in the world by a long way, but it meant my solitary walks in the woods were off the agenda - way off.

Week one wasn't so bad as I was completely housebound and we're lucky enough to have enough space to escape each other - although still close enough for Steve to hear my pleas for a cup of tea (most of the time!)

Week two onward was when I really began to feel it - the fact that I couldn't escape anywhere alone.  At a time when restrictions were easing and friends were excitedly heading off on holidays, or meeting up with other friends and family, all I wanted was to do was to go for a walk alone.  Completely alone.  Like I did in the woods.

Although I could get around a bit more, I could only tackle flat tarmac and, even then, only for short distances, as I rebuilt the strength in my leg.  The thing is, just about all nice flat walks with a view are incredibly popular.  We found quieter spots, but I craved solitude at a time when everyone else in the world seemed to be craving other people.

Morecambe - perfect place for a flat walk

I tried not to get cranky, but I may, on occasion, have failed.  I read an article about a child who had been desperately sick but "not complained once" - sadly the same would never be said of me.  If there's one thing my broken leg and lack of mobility has taught me, it's that I am going to be a hell of a handful when I'm old and less mobile.  Seriously, I will be a cantankerous old moo and possibly the scourge of any retirement home I end up in.  Remember Waiting for God?  Diana will seem angelic by comparison.

Desperate to push myself to regain some independence and solitude I persuaded Steve that Hoad Hill in Ulverston would be a great idea.  True, there would be people, but if we went late in the day and took the pretty way down we could enjoy some peace.  It worked - and my leg didn't fare too badly.  (It's week 6 - I was expecting to be throwing somersaults by now.)

Lulled into a dangerous sense of "I'm fine now, honest I am" I suggested Black Combe for Bank Holiday Monday.  I love Black Combe.  I mean *really* love it.  Steve tried suggesting it was, perhaps, a little ambitious.  I fixed him with my "Diana stare".  He relented.  Game on!

I struggled in a couple of places on the way up - a few slightly steeper sections that I simply did not have the strength in my leg to pull myself up - but I am nothing if not sheer bloody minded.  We took a long lunch break half way up in the sunshine and eventually made it to the top around 3pm, where I collapsed in the shelter with a flask of hot tea and a handful of painkillers - but I'd made it - and the best part lay ahead!

Solitude at last!

Pretty much everyone who goes up Black Combe returns down the same path.  Not me.  I head off the northern side, dropping down to Butcher's Breast then following the path along the bottom back to Silecroft. Yes, it was far too far and overly ambitious and yes, I was in a huge amount of pain by the end of it.  BUT we only saw one other person between leaving the summit around 3:15pm and limping back to the car just before 8pm.  Solitude.  Utterly blissful solitude.  

Every single ounce of pain was worth spending time alone on a beautiful hillside, on an utterly perfect day.  I totally understand that, for many folks, the exact opposite is true, and it's fantastic to see friends excited about spending time together again but, for now at least, I will relish the opportunity to get back to my precious, solitudinous, walks.  

Whoop Whoop!

Fell Cottage - every time we pass I dream of living here...

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Samuel Johnson was wrong

I've been travelling a lot for work lately and, last week, I was in London for a couple of days working in a trendy hotel which had lots of quotes around the wall and no visible reception desk (I appreciate it makes the foyer look larger but why on earth do away with a reception desk?  A couple of folks in suits perched at a table tapping away on their laptop could be anyone. Would you like me to go around pestering all of your guests until I find the one who happens to be on reception duties or simply hang around looking lost until someone takes pity on me?  But I digress...)

The quote which dominated the wall in the dining area was this "Sir, when a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford" - well known words from Samuel Johnson.  He was speaking to his biographer James Boswell, trying to convince him that he wouldn't miss his native Scotland if he moved to the big smoke, but I couldn't help thinking that however leaned the man may have been, he definitely got it wrong with this one.  London is lovely in so many ways but it definitely doesn't have dibs on "all that life can afford" - for starters here are just a few of the things which Cumbria has that London doesn't.

Hills

London has plenty of places named hill but no real, proper, hills.  Primrose Hill is 65m high, Notting Hill isn't even a hill (it's only 36m above sea level) and the highest point in London, Betsom's Hill, is only 215m high and surely only counts as being "in London" on a technicality.  And, have you noticed how so many place names in London (and other cities for that matter), have retained the name of the thing which was flattened in order to make way for whatever is now built on top of them?  Places like Waltham Forest (although there are still a few small parks left), St Martin-in-the-Fields (which is on a busy junction right next to Trafalgar Square and miles from the nearest fields) and Wood Green which, despite having been both woodland and a large green space in the past, is now a "...busy urban activity centre with sizeable shopping area..."  I'm guessing updating those names would be bad for business; "St Martin-in-the-middle-of-a-crossroads" doesn't have the same ring to it.

So, Mr Johnson, London definitely appears to be lacking hills; the soaring peaks of the central Lake District, the comfortable familiarity of the Langdale Pikes and the gorgeous rolling hills around the Duddon Valley for starters...

View from Great Gable

Langdale Pikes

Orrest Head

Duddon Valley

Lakes

There may be a few small lakes in London but anything you can walk around in under an hour without getting your boots muddy doesn't really count in my book.  Up here we have so many lakes they named an entire national park after them "The LAKE District" - in fact they are SO fab that we even got UNESCO World Heritage Status - tell that to Mr Boswell next time you see him.  As a comparison the Serpentine in London covers an area of 16 hectrares while Elterwater, the smallest "lake" in the Lake District, covers 17 hectares.  We are also home to the largest and the deepest lakes in England - Windermere and Wastwater respectively.

Windermere

Wastwater

Grasmere

Peace

When I'm away in London on my travels, this is the thing I miss the most.  There is nowhere in London where I can find true peace and quiet - granted there are some lovely parks and quiet back streets, but at no point can I escape the distant hum of cars or take a deep breath knowing that there is no-one else for miles around.  To be fair, back in 1777, when Samuel Johnson muttered his now infamous words to his friend and biographer James Boswell, London probably did have a lot of really quiet corners (Wood Green was probably still woody and greeny for a start) - but these days it's hard to find true peace there.

Of course on a busy bank holiday it can be hard to find true peace in Cumbria too, but there are still plenty of quiet nooks where you can escape the crowds and the drone of the motor engine and enjoy the tranquillity and solitude that is so hard to find in London.

The Eden Valley

Smardale Gill

Black Combe

Unlike Samuel Johnson, people are not going to be quoting our books in 250 years time but, then again, you never know!  They are full of fab photos and fun facts and we are happy to ship directly and cut out the Amazon middle man.  Click the pic to find out more & order yours.  😀

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12 Months, 12 Pics

Each year I write a review of the year and each year I waffle on far too much - so this year I'm keeping it simple: 12 months, 12 pics.  As I write this storm Frank is battering Cumbria again and we're looking forward to a drier new year when we can hopefully help to do something to repair the damage Frank and his friends have done to Cumbria's image - but, for now - a quick photographic review of 2012.

January

Book writing meant lots of research and many days spent in libraries - but we also got out and about a bit too.  We revisited Smardale Gill, one of my favourite spots and one of the chapters in our book.  Coincidence? You decide.

View from bench next to Smardale Gill viaduct

February

I loved this walk even though it didn't turn out quite as planned.  Our aim had been to walk up The Band and then on to Crinkle Crags, but towards the top of The Band the most almighty wind hit so we beat a retreat back down and we took a nice long soupy break on this nice, and rather sheltered, bench.

Langdale Pikes from The Band

March

I found myself with an entire day on my hands so decided to take myself off up Black Combe.  Absolutely love this fell and the weather was perfect.  I ditched the car too and took the train around the coast to Silecroft - perfect.

Black Combe

April

There were so many fab places we went in April and so many pics to choose from, but this is definitely my favourite.  Most of the snow had gone but there were a few small patches on the top of Stoney Cove Pike so we walked past them like the mature adults we are...

Incoming!

May

May half term and our nephews came to visit.  There are many fantastic tourist attractions in Cumbria that are perfect for kids, but there's not much that can beat 2 hours on the shores of Coniston Water skimming stones.

June

June was one of the busiest months I've ever had and in amongst it all we took part in the inaugural ride of the Morecambe Bay Cycleway - 4 days kicking off at Sandy Gap on Walney Island and ending at Glasson Dock.  The weather was perfect and so were all of the views.

July

Much as we adore Cumbria we also like to explore further afield.  Throughout most of July and August we were in Scotland.  We began by hiking up Ben Nevis which is definitely further than it looks...

Ben Nevis

August

We drove the north coast of Scotland in our camper van from Skye to Inverness and had an absolute ball.  Sometimes the views that stay with you aren't necessarily the most stunning but the ones that somehow connect with you.  We saw some spectacular sights, but this was definitely my favourite camping spot - the beautiful Tarbat Ness where we had our very own lighthouse keeping us company.

September

Back home and time for a fabulous late summer stroll up one of our nearest fells.  Whitbarrow Scar sits alongside the main A590 but even on the sunniest days of summer you generally have the place to yourself.  It punches well above its weight when it comes to views too - Morecambe Bay sweeping away to the south and rows of fells lining up to the north.  Be sure to pack a picnic!

October

In October my mum came to visit and we were offered the opportunity to try out some off roading mobility scooters.  At 80 my mum may not be so good on her legs any more, but her sense of adventure is clearly undiminished.  So that's where I get it from...

November

After a minor delay our very first book was released on 1st Nov.  It is a whole new adventure for us and it's been thrilling watching it sell.  At the moment we're out of stock, as are our distributors which is, I suppose, good news and bad news all at the same time.  We're hugely indebted to the local press and radio stations for all of their support.

December

I spent a lot of time in December blogging about the #LakeDistrictBid - but when I wasn't doing that I was busy making reindeer at Spooniversity.  Odd sounding but we meet once a month in Brown Robin Nature reserve to learn about woodland management, wildlife and traditional woodworking techniques. 

And that, as they say, is that.  2015 kept us plenty busy and 2016 is looking to be even busier, but before then a couple of restful days with the family and maybe the odd drink or 2...

We both wish you all a peaceful and Happy New Year!

No Country for Old Boots

It won 4 Oscars and was raved about by all and sundry but so far as I'm concerned, No Country for Old Men is 2 hours and 2 minutes of my life that I'll never get back.  Shame really, I usually like Tommy Lee Jones.  The thing is I'm about to do one of those review thingumys again and wanted to point out that whatever I might have to say about a product, I can only ever give you my opinion of it, you may choose to disagree and that's fair enough,the world would be a boring place if we all liked the same things (and damned near unbearable if we all liked No Country for Old Men, but I digress...)

If you've read the blog before you'll know how much I loved my old boots and I thought they were doing fine - it wasn't until Steve got some new boots (having killed his old ones walking 214 Wainwrights in 214 days) that I looked more closely at mine and realised that though the tops were fine, the soles were damned near smooth and as the Lake District really is "No Country for Old Boots" (you see what I did there?) I figured it was time to nab me a new pair too.

Enter GriSport - tucked away near the Dolomites in Italy and manufacturing boots in a factory where 70% of the power comes from solar energy.  (Not so easy to do in Cumbria for some reason...)  They sent me a lovely pair of their Everest boots to play with and see what I thought.

Anyway, I figured that as I've been learning Italian for a few years now I'd make the review useful by translating some common English/ Northern phrases into Italian for you as I go - you know, in case you ever decide to visit the factory or anything...

1.  I say, I'm absolutely parched, do you know of somewhere I can wet my whistle?  "Dico, ho grande sete, sai da qualche parte dove posso bagnare il mio fischietto?

Never mind the hiking part, let's tackle the important stuff - do the boots look cool enough to be seen in the pub with.  Yes they do - if there's one thing you can trust the Italians to do it's design something that looks good.  Mind you, that beer looks good too and that was made in Ulverston...

2.  I'm so hungry I could eat a scabby horse. "Ho fame cosi grande che mangerei un cavallo crostoso."  

Not only are the boots good enough to be seen in the pub with, they'd also pass muster in most pub restaurants - so long as they weren't too muddy obviously.  Not found a pub serving scabby horses yet - will look for it on next year's Master Chef.

3.  Do you sell Compeed?  I've got blisters the size of conkers.   "Avete Compeed?  Ho i vesciche come i ipposcastani"

I've given these boots a good workout.  I've done 8 miles up and around Whitbarrow Scar, 5 miles around Hampsfell and another 9 up and over Black Combe and I can honestly promise you that you won't be needing that phrase.  They were proper comfy from the off and my feet were almost as fresh when I took the boots off as they were when I put them on.  The smell wasn't as fresh mind...

4.  In these shoes?  I don't think so! "Nel queste scarpe?  Non penso cosi!"

OK, not so much a phrase as a fabulous Kirsty MacColl song - but a perfect way to point out that the boots come with easy to follow care instructions.  They didn't specifically say no paddling in them, but I'm guessing the salt water wouldn't do them much good.

5.  If I don't sit down soon, I'll fall down.  "Si mi non siedo presto, mi cadró"

I'm pleased to report that although these are high boots (well up over the ankle) they are light (1205g) so if you need to put your feet up to enjoy a well earned rest they won't be too heavy

6.  That'll put a spring in your step. "Quello metterà una balzo in il tuo passo"

Again, light, flexible and bouncable.  Plenty of spring for jumping on and off rocks repetitively so the shot you had planned can be caught on a camera phone.

7.  She took off up Whitbarrow Scar like a rat up a drainpipe.  "Ha decollato su Whitbarrow Scar come un ratto su un tubo di drenaggio."  (And if you're thinking the Italians are using the same words as us for things like rat, it's probably the other way around.  Blame the Romans.)

The day I got them I strapped them onto my feet and took off - no breaking in, no gentle walks to the shops, no nothing - straight on and straight up.  No problems at all.  At least not for me.  Steve was cursing a bit 'cos he didn't have nice new shiny boots to play with.

8.  He was in such a hurry that he met himself coming back.  "Era in tanta fretta che ha incontrato lui stesso tornare indietro"  (This was *really* horrible to try and translate!)

Because they are light and comfy you can whiz around all over the place and have a lot of fun taking silly photos.

9.  Striding Edge?  It was a walk in the park!  "Striding Edge?  É stato una camminare nel parco."

Though I've not  taken these boots up striding edge yet, I can confirm that they are proper hiking boots for proper hikes on proper big mountains.  The high sides keep my ankles cosy and firm and the fabulous grippy soles stop me slipping over quite as much as I used to.  And there was me thinking it was the gin when I could have blamed my old boots all along.

10.  Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs!  "Allora, andró alla piede del nostri scalini!"

Stairs, hillsides, stiles, whatever - the boots bounded through it all.  I'm trying to think of a downside to tell you about to keep the review balanced and the only 2 things I can come up with are that a half size might be nice as I could feel my toes catching the ends on the descent from Black Combe - though not badly so - and the fold in the leather catches the little toe on my left foot a bit, but that's only because I dislocated it last year and its still a bit grumpy.

I plan to wear the boots throughout the winter and post an update in around 6 months to let you know how they are once they've worn in a bit.  Best get my Italian phrasebook out and start brushing up on my grammar ready.

14 Things Hiking can learn from Gaming

I went out hiking all on my own yesterday - not a problem in itself, but it gave me too much time to think.  I put that time to good use though and by the end of the day had a whole list of improvements to hiking which could be made if only it were a computer game...

1.  First up there'd be achievements - "Achievement Unlocked - Climbing Blencathra" or "Achievement Unlocked - you remembered the flasks"  that sort of thing.

2.  At the drop of a hat you'd be able to change into any clothes to suit any conditions - and ALL of them would be way more impressive than your current set of waterproofs.

3.  Never mind geocaching, the hills would be full of hidden health packs and whatever illness, fatigue or injury has befallen you, wolf one of these babies down and you'll be just fine.

4.  Whenever you spot a monument, building or feature you were previously unaware of, a large white arrow and helpful text box would pop up next to it telling you all you need to know.

5.  You would NEVER get lost again because the route would light up ahead of you just like it does in Fable 2.

6.   At all times there would be a proximity detector available on your phone to tell you if there are other people in your general vicinity.  This would be useful for changes of clothes, toilet visits and arguments.

7.  Invisibility cloaks would allow you to sneak past sheep without disturbing them and creep up on any other wildlife you've been trying for years to get a photograph of.

8.  When you reach an uncrossable river or bog, any surrounding objects such as fence posts, drinking troughs or old farm machinery would bounce up and down Lego style, allowing you to assemble them into a bridge, boat or raft.  (This will, of course, unlock another achievement)

9.  Light bridges - there'd be hand held light bridges which could be deployed with the flick of a wrist and allow you to cross from, say, Scafell Pike to Sca Fell without going all the way down and back up again,

10.  Magic maps would allow you to select your destination and zoom right there.  Not to cheat when getting to the top of the fells (where's the fun in that?), but to help when you're soaked through and still 5 miles from the pub.

11.  You'd be able to carry an ENORMOUS quantity of stuff before you became over encumbered.

12.  Your regenerating shields would protect you from midges and cleggs.  Especially cleggs.

13.  When required, absolutely any wire could be used as a zipwire, all you'd need to do is jump on and assume a stylish pose.

14.  Cortana would replace your GPRS - not the voice on your windows phone, the original Cortana from Halo - because, let's face it, she rocks and is a WAY better idea than having HAL in your head "I can't let you go that way Dave"

And just to prove I really did get out on the fells yesterday - here's a few pics of my jolly up Black Combe.

Achievement unlocked - Black Combe

The fabled town of Bootle

Black Combe with zipwires...  ;-)

Beautiful beach at Silecroft

View from the transporter home.